猫 Superstar

Happy New Year Everyone! =)

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Earlier today, my mom asked me to get my sister’s hair clips and when I couldn’t find them, I was struck by panic–as always. My mom got upset too–as always. That’s when I realized that old fears never go away. I’M A BAD LOOKER. I really am. When I was younger, everyone used to ask me to look for things for them, especially my mom. Since I rarely find anything fast–if at all, it was either people get upset and in my mom’s case, upset, irritated, and disappointed… Since then, whenever I’m asked to look for something, I feel some sort of panic. I’m 22 but whenever my mom yells at me even for something as trivial as not finding hair clips, I still want to cry like a seven year old girl…

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What do you do when you look in the mirror and you hate the person staring back at you?

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What if your plans for yourself is different from plans of the people you love? Do you choose your own happiness or of your loved ones?

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I am packing up and going far away. Away from America and farther away from the Philippines. Maybe go to a place where no one knows me just so I can be myself… where no one expects me to be something. Just me. Where I don’t have to prove I’m good, that I can support my family, that I’m talented (which I’m not), that I’m smart… I wish that God would give me enough money to buy my parents a house and to send all my three siblings to college so that I can runaway in seclusion from the mostly financial pressures of this life.

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Freelance copywriting is my business now, so if want some copy done, email me. Hahaha… No, really. I need the money to buy my freedom. (http://www.garciawriting.com)

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What do you do when it’s your heart and your conscience that they hold hostage? Your body is free but your situation is much worse than physical bondage? Life sucks. Or so I think… what would a little girl from Sudan or Kenya say to me?